I’m a fairly bitter person. I know this and I’ve long accepted this about myself. Whenever Valentine’s day runs around I can’t help but think about how it’s a marketing scheme to sell flowers and chocolate. And it for sure is that. But it’s also a day to be thankful for those around us.
I’m not big on relationships. I spent a lot of time when I was younger worrying about it, and then reached a point in my life where I prioritized working on myself before worrying about letting other people into my life. I’m at a place in life now where I’m open to meeting people, but a combination of the world being on fire and my social skills slowly regressing has made that difficult. Regardless, I used to be quite a popular kid. I remember when I was still young, maybe 10 or 11, and I was always surrounded by people.
One memory stands out in particular. I had a girlfriend back in primary school. Obviously I was at an age where I didn’t really know what that meant, but there was this really nice girl in my class that was really good friends with, so that made her my girlfriend. Damn life was so much simpler back then. I want to go back to when we played as kids, but things changed, and that’s the way it is. Sometimes Tupac’s lyrics just hit home. Back on topic, I didn’t have social skills back then either, but I was given a huge lollipop in the shape of a heart. The happiness I got from that could undo years of depression in a heartbeat. I still feel a smile creeping up when I think about it. Knowing someone cares about you and wants to show you that is one of the greatest feelings there is.
So I could go on a rant about how capitalism is evil and they’re manipulating everyone to buy things they don’t really need and guilt trip people into spending money on their loved ones, and that’s partially true, but that’s not the point. Sometimes a bad thing leads to good things. And although I think it’s better for people to buy flowers and chocolates for their loved ones out of their own volition, people like me would definitely benefit from the reminder. So to everyone who celebrates this day all over the world, I hope you have a great one. I’ll go buy myself some chocolate and call it self-care!